The Astros will officially not play in the wild card game this season! If you would like to catch the full audio recording of the Astros afterparty where Steve Sparks goes trademark bonkers in the celebrating clubhouse, you can find the whole thing right here.
If you like photography, maybe this form of media will suit your needs.
As for the game itself, it went just about as normal as you would think. The Astros dropped 13 at home on the pour guests and absolutely dominated in every facet of the game. George Springer also had his first 3 home run game of his career. The next important game is October 12th. Mark your calendars.
In celebration of the year that was, here is the Top 10 Astros Moments of 2019.
Also to celebrate how awesome our team is, here is a fun refresher of when Trevor Crowe was hitting 3rd in our favorite real life baseball team, to remind us how far we've come.
Back to fun stats about the 2019 Astros, they do, in fact, have the best offense since the '27 Yankees. I'd argue they have the best offense of all time considering half your beer league softball team could probably hit a 1927 mlb pitcher's fastball with 400 innings and a gnarly case of yellow fever under his belt, but I digress.
Could the Astros make the first end-of-awards sweep this season?
Alleged-fully-functional-pitcher-this-time Brad Peacock is back just in time for playoffs and baby, that's real good.
Here is the rotation for the remainder of the regular season, which also includes a floating of an idea that involves Urquidy making the playoff roster over Wade Miley. Because. You know..
Altuve called his 30 HR season "a dream come true"
Larry Dierker reminisced about the "great ride" he has had with the Astros.
Astros v. Twins ALDS. What would that matchup look like? How sick would Flick Nickem feel if he had to actively root against Marwin Gonzalez. Time may soon tell..
Forrest Whitley was awesome in his AFL debut, which is a very good sign.
New words were added to the dictionary recently for 2019. Words like "fatberg", "fabulosity", "aphantasia", and more.
Indiana University students, because I'm sure it's getting old for them to always watch their sports teams lose all the time at this point, decided to take up a new pastime that doesn't revolve around a whole lot of competition but I'm sure just as much fun: making giant paper mache things!