This is the lineup that lost the season for the Astros, and this is the Astros that will help the Cardinals clinch the NL Central:
Funny story. True story. The tweet to which I have linked has all names/positions running together - no punctuation (which, in a 140-character limit, is excusable). So when I first saw this, I read it "2B Towles." And I immediately hammered out a 1,500 word post on how monumental this development is. Thankfully, I proofread, and check my source twice. Then I noticed. I might just post it, anyway...