*Gonna lead off with a link to the newest Lima Time Episode. It's (officially) our 100th episode. That's weird to type out. Right around the 50:00 mark, I completely lose it.
*The Astros beat the Cubs. All-time, the Astros have a 379-333 record against the Cubs, a .532 Win%. People only like them because (1) WGN and (2) they lost for a long time in a row.
*Cole Hamels got shelled (4IP, 7H/6ER, 0K:4BB), which we can all stand back and appreciate. That's two straight starts in which Hamels didn't get a 13th out against the Astros, and you just hate to see it. You have to go back all the way to May 25, 2008 to find the last start that Hole Camels didn't record a strikeout. Who was the opponent? It was the Houston MF Astros. It's the 3rd time he didn't strike *anyone* out in a start in his career. Hinch, on Hamels:
We've done that before against Hamels where you look up and it's 70-plus pitches in three innings or into the mid-80s into the fourth inning. That means we're being disciplined.
Thanks for blocking the trade to Houston in 2015, you absolute bell-end. Hamels, in August 2015:
It was probably one of the tougher decisions because I know they're a great team and I know they're going to go out and win. I have the utmost respect for A.J. I played with him when I was very young. I've seen what they've done and I think they've done great things. I have a four-year contract still. So if it was a different situation where I had a year left or a year and a half I probably would have gone [to Houston]. But because it is more of a longer term I had to weigh those sorts of variables for those nine teams that I had on the list. I didn't want to budge from that.
Get a new Magic 8-Ball, dick. Metroplex Trash. Derek Zoolander lookin ass boiiiiiiii.
*Astros pitchers struck out 17 Cubs. It's the most strikeouts they've recorded since May 11, when Astros pitchers struck out 18 batters from East Cisco. It's the 29th time in 55 games the Astros have struck out 10+ batters in a game.
*Gerrit Cole allowed a 1st Inning homer. That's the 12th he's allowed this season, but only the 3rd in which there was a runner on base when said homer was hit. Then he struck out 12 batters. Gerrit Cole, 12+ Strikeout games, by year:
2013: 1 (19 starts)
2014: 1 (22 starts)
2015: 0 (32 starts)
2016: 0 (21 starts)
2017: 0 (33 starts)
2018: 5 (32 starts)
2019: 2 (12 starts)
So that's two games with 12+ strikeouts in 127 starts with Pittsburgh (1.6%) and seven games with 12+ strikeouts with the Astros (15.9%). Brent Strom turned Gerrit Cole into a cheat code. Cole, on giving up Rizzo's 1st Inning homer:
I kept trying to make pitches. It was a mistake to Rizzo, just a poor pitch over the middle...I just brushed it off and kept going.
Ass-Clown Joe Maddon:
[Cole] has got great velocity and carry. If you could just not chase out of the zone on him - he really relies on that. That's a big part of what he does. The ball looks good and maintains its altitude and is hard to lay off. For the most part, a lot of the strikes he gets are out of the zone, and you've really got to force him into the zone to get him.
Dayn Perry notes that Cole's 39% K-rate (percentages of batters he has struck out) is higher than Pedro Martinez's 37.5% - the highest K-rate for a single season in history.
*Roberto Osuna allowed two home runs for the 2nd time in his career. The only other time it had happened was August 19, 2016. He had allowed two home runs in the 46 previous IPs for the Astros
combined. Addison Russell just might be the first hitter to get arrested for domestic abuse to homer off a reliever who also got arrested for domestic abuse.
A.J. Hinch is not concerned about Osuna's very recent struggles on the mound.
*The Cubs' Javy Baez got that Platinum Sombrero - 0x5, 5Ks. It's the 12th time the Astros have struck a player out five times in a game, the 8th time that a player got 5Ks in 5PAs, and the first since Dustin Fowler did it on July 9, 2018.
*The Astros won a game without Springer, Altuve, and Correa. End post.
*Look, I want to see Yordan Alvarez as much as you do. But if you can't be happy for the undrafted Jack Mayfield, then I want nothing to do with you. Mayfield - a fellow Sooner (grad school alum and current adjunct faculty alert) - grinded through 617 games in the minors since 2013. He had a .934 OPS with Round Rock this year, and then he goes out and smokes a double off the wall for his first MLB hit and then got an RBI in his next AB. Good for him. Good for us. And apparently, after Aledmys Diaz's earlier hamstring strain the Astros had him fly out to Boston but Diaz's injury wasn't as bad as they thought, so he got sent back to Triple-A. Hinch, on Jack Mayfield:
It's a long journey for these guys and his story is one to be told because it's improbable and he never thought he'd get the opportunity. We teased him a little bit last week with almost an opportunity, and I can only imagine the emotions that someone goes through.
Literally 1200 draft-eligible players got drafted in 2013, 40 by the Astros. Jack Mayfield was not one of them. He made it to the Majors before 36 of them - and Tony Kemp and Tyler White are the only ones drafted by the Astros in 2013 to make it to Houston. Shoutout to Jack Mayfield, you beautiful Sooner. Mayfield, on his first hit:
It was amazing. It went by so fast. It's hard to remember, but it was my third pitch, and I was fortunate to get enough barrel to hit it off the wall. It's a big sigh of relief to get the first knock and just kind of relax and enjoy the game a little more. It really helped me slow the game down.
He got the robe, he gave us a speech and told us what he saw out there. He got doused with some beer and Listerine and shower soap and ketchup and mustard and a whole bunch of other stuff.
Jack Mayfield, undrafted Boomer Sooner, gets the once-in-a-lifetime thrill of a double in his first MLB AB. He’s cheered by his wife and family, and the exit velocity of his smash off the wall is exceeded only by this adoration. pic.twitter.com/XKkIlzzD1N— Dinn Mann (@mooseoutfront) May 27, 2019
*Jenny Dial Creech: Mayfield makes the most of his MLB debut.
*Alex Bregman was 2x5 - his 2nd multi-hit game since May 12. He has 34K:39BB this season.
*Derek Fisher was 2x5 with a triple and has a 1.000 OPS, haterz.
*Yuli Gurriel got three hits for the 24th time in his career, and the 4th time this season. The Astros are 22-2 when Gurriel has 3+ hits.
*Josh Reddick went 0x5 with 0K for the 18th time in his career, the 2nd time this season. It's the 4th time in his career that he got 5PAs and didn't reach base due to walk or error.
*No, Jose Altuve is not going to be in the lineup before Wednesday.
*An analysis of four million pitches thrown shows just how many mistakes umpires make.
*RIP Bill Buckner. He struck out 453 times and walked 450 times in over 10,000 plate appearances. His career - and life - should not be determined by one ground ball. Dan Shaughnessy says as much
*The Grace of Keanu Reeves.
*BBC's Joel Gunter: Secret Spectacles. Story is crazy.
*My dude Marcelo Bielsa has agreed to stay another year at Leeds United, and are now favored to win the league in 2019-2020.
*Dementia stopped a major artist from painting. That presented a lucrative opportunity for some.
*A Musical Selection: