Friday, May 2, 2014

The Seussian World of Astros

The Pitcher in the Belly Itcher

The team did not shine.
They're not good to play.
So we sat at the park.
Waiting for the far, far, faraway day.

I sat there with Orbit.
We sat there, we two.
And I said, "How I wish
The Goatpen had a clue!"

No batters they got out
And too many called "Ball!"
So we sat in the stands.
With no saves at all.

Green Grass and Fans

Would you? Could you?
Win a game?
Beat them! Beat them!
No more of the same.

They would not,
could not,
win a game.

We may win one.
You will see.
We may win one
out of three!

Astros in Lastros

Oh Noes!

Astros in Lastros.
Castros say Oh Noes.

Oh Noes my Astros
With Castros in Lastros.

The Purpura

At the far end of town
where Tal's Hill looms
and the team on the field is filled with gloom
and opposing bats always seem to go Boom!
is the Office of the Lifted Purpura.

And over Tal's Hill, some people say
if you try hard enough you can still see, today
where the Purpura once stood
making the home team no good
before somebody ran the Purpura away.

What was the Purpura?
And why was it there?
And why was it ran off and laughed at somewhere
from the far end of town where Tal's Hill slopes.
The old Luhnow-ler now lives there.
His plan. Our hopes.

Epicness courtesy of Ryan Dunsmore (@d_more55)

Oh, the Pennants You'll Win!

Tomorrow is our day.
We're off to the Pennant!
We're off and away!

We'll have pitchers on the mound.
We'll have bats in the box.
We will beat anyone
while wearing high socks.
We'll be at the top. And we'll know how to win.
And FULL will our bandwagon be at that then.

We'll look at the standings. At the top we'll belong.
And some will then say, "I believed all along."
With our mound full of pitchers and box full of bats,
We'll know at that moment it was worth all of that.


Anonymous said...

Hunsicker was a wise one who brought a Beltran,
Which saw the Purpura and ran, ran, ran, ran.

We loved the Purpura and booed the Beltran,
But wisdom is wisdom, tho in only one man.

Anonymous said...

I meant what I said,
And I said what I meant.
To the Astros I'm faithful,

Anonymous said...

It's outrageous.
It is even contagious!
As the Astros' bad play spreads everywhere.
And it's here, on first, and way over there!

So that even the Springers
Don't hit the dingers
and make errors on errors -
oh they're all great big terrors!

Perhaps one day,
we'll see them all play
a little bit well --
man, wouldn't that be swell.

Jayne Hansen said...

There once was a man from Nantucket
Who told the Red Sox to go suck it.
The 'Stros are a team
That I hold in esteem.
My love for them, I just can't duck it!

BustaPozee said...

This poem is going to suck
Kinda like getting hit by a truck
For the Astros this feeling's the same
Because Bo Porter no longer gives a fu^&!

Anonymous said...

Roses are red, violets are blue
Most Baseball poems rhyme
This one doesn't