Deadspin has a great compilation of the 100 Worst Baseball Players of All Time (Part I is linked). The Astros are represented:
18. J.R. Phillips (Astros, 1997-98)
22. Brian L. Hunter (1994-96, 2002-03)
31. Jose Lima (1997-2001)
And...go.
We didn't come out here to play tiddlywinks, son.
-Hal Smith